the kneaders experience.

(perhaps the first chapter of a new blog series?)

*caits picture

remember how i got a job kinda a while back? well basically, i love it.
(other than the fact i wear a hair nat, and a nappy hat)
and for reals. it is some of thee best, people watching.
so many blog worthy stories i could tell.
people often mistake me as being lots older than i am.
my co-workers boyfriend guessed 25. good guess dingus. you're 10 years off. 
and tonight's story, was especially awkward interesting.


... every saturday night after eight is half off pastries.
aka- the pastry rush. people line up early to wait, so they can have first choice. and by 9:00 everything is basically gone. 
we have the regulars who come in every week, the little guy with the accent, jen and her husband (funniest couple ever), the group from my ward, etc. etc. well there's one guy, we can call him mark. he's there just about every week. he's probably 45-50 and he's super nice. after a while doing saturday nights i got to know him, considering he always came, and lately he's started his bring his son. they look like your typical utah county family. overly-friendly and sporting the byu apparel. 
well i never thought much of it. just another person who likes discounted heavenly pastries.

back to today. it was super busy for a saturday but finally around 7:00 it calmed down. a couple kids came in, (they were probly 18ish? maybe rm's?) anyway, they were pretty cute, they looked like good boys, and after a minute i recognized one as mark's son. (which was weird because the pastry rush wasn't for another hour.) after much contemplation on the menu (like 15 minutes) deciding what they should get, they finally decided on one mint brownie. i kinda laughed cause they'd been standing there so long and were just getting one mint brownie for both of them? as i'm ringing him up, i can feel him intently staring at me, soo trying to be polite and make conversation i ask, "your dad always comes in for the pastry rush, right?" (i wasn't being intentionally creepy. i'm just observant.) "oh, haha uhm yeah."  i continue to slide his card, and then he asked my name. 
"uhm i'm brittney." "oh, cool. i'm tom." this is when i realized it was going down hill.
awesome. i get the brownie, put in a little bag and handed it to him.
his friend had mysteriously disappeared at this point, pretty sure he went back out to the car?
him: *awkward glance up down up down* "so uhm, do you think i could get a number with that brownie?"
(i could tell this probably wasn't something he did often. and hah, how long do you think that line took to come up with?)
my first instinct was just to laugh. but i realized he was serious. and then i was just kinda shocked. and was quickly debating how to respond.
"sorry i have a boyfriend" (lie.)
"it's against store policy actually" (obvious shut down)
"uhm, i think you should be fine with just the brownie." (flat out rude)
"i don't actually have a phone! darn!" (hah. you can see the phone through my apron, or in my pocket.)
well, i ended up just going with the awkward truth.
"well uhm, i'm actually only 15.. but uh.."
"oh! uh.. kay cool well thanks!" *awkwardly hurries out of the building. 

dear kid. i'm sorry. i could tell you were super embarrassed. and i really would've given you my number. but that would've just made things more awkward. as we're texting and you realize i wouldn't even be able to date you. and for all i know you could be an rm. in search of a wife. i still have two and half  years of highschool to go.
i'm almost 100% positive your dad put you up to this.
*welcome to utah. where everyone is in search of an eternal companion. for themself. or for anyone really, in this case, their kid.*
and suddenly i realized his over-friendliness and being a loyal customer was perhaps for more than just the pastires. he probably thought he was the brilliant match-maker who had just picked out his future daughter in law. it probly wasn't coincidence that he started bringing his son in and his wife came last week too. their suspiscious whispering and smiling at me? "honey, look at her, don't you think they should get married?" and later it was probably, "just atleast ask for her number, take her out once."
hah. poor kid was probly super embarrassed. but what was i supposed to do? give him my number...? what use would that be? "hey, so since i'm only 15, wanna hang out?" hahaha..

moral of the story. eh, there is no moral. it was just a super funny occurence.
he'll probly never come back to kneaders.

oh yeah, and his dad show up an hour later for pastries. he kept kinda smiling like either he knew exactly what had happened, or like he had yet to talk to his son and in his mind it had all played out perfectly. i felt awkawrd, and made sure he ended up at the other register, and that i didn't have to bring out his pastries.